Stan and Lisa, both 32, are engaged. Lisa was raised in a Roman Catholic home; Stan was raised in a secular family that did not belong to any defined religion. As they began planning their wedding, they realized there were many arguments about topics and choices they had never even thought … [CONTINUED] about before. Lisa wanted a traditional religious wedding service and a big reception with ‘all the trimmings’. Stan and his family wanted a small, intimate service. Stan thought it was a waste of money to spend so much on a wedding and reception; both he and Lisa had student loan debt which he thought they should pay off. As these differences became more and more difficult, they decided to enter into our Marriage Preparation Program so that we could openly discuss many issues and life situations that would eventually come up in their marriage.

Our goal in the Marriage Preparation Program is to raise the issues, address them openly and assist the couple in either finding compromises that work or even, fortunately, only in a few instances, come to the decision that this union was not meant to be; that the differences and different styles of the parties were too extreme for them to reach a healthy way of proceeding. Although this outcome would be very painful, we would suggest that coming to that conclusion before the wedding rather than after several years and possibly children is a better result.