What Makes a Good Adoptive Parent?

  • Understanding of the uniqueness of adoptive parenthood
  • Comfort with and full acceptance of parenting a child not born to you
  • Acceptance and respect for your child’s birth family
  • Commitment to spending time with your child to build and maintain a positive parent-child relationship
  • Playfulness and a sense of humour
  • Flexibility
  • Tolerance for feelings of ambivalence and negativity
  • Understanding of your own life experiences and how these can impact your parenting
  • Readiness to reach out for help from others
  • Ability to delay gratification and not expect immediate rewards from parenting
  • Realistic expectations of yourself and your child
  • Commitment to follow through on maintaining important relationships and connections for your child
  • Recognition that your child’s curiosity and interest in their birth parents is not a rejection of you
  • Openness to discussing your child’s questions about birth family and adoption
  • Readiness to make a lifelong commitment to a child


Patricia Fenton, MSW RSW
Milestones & Transitions
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