Loss as Part of Adoption

by:   Michaele-Sue Goldblatt, MSW,RSW, Milestones & Transitions

Not all prospective adoptive parents come to Adoption because of Loss, but many do because of Infertility, Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Neonatal Death.

Their task in becoming people who are able to fully embrace and love a child (or children) not born to them, is to recognize their loss and mourn the child that was for only a brief time or what he or should might have been.

Does one ever completely resolve loss?  We think not, but a person can come to terms with his or her loss and still be able to hold that loss inside while giving love to another.

In many instances, the loss that the adoptive parent sustained may give him or her a level of empathy for the child and his or her birth parents who have also sustained loss.

Here is the story of one mother’s wish to hold her babies…..you can feel her sadness through her words.

https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/first-person/article-if-a-whale-can-hold-its-dead-calf-for-days-why-cant-human-parents-do/